Bottom 10

Got the idea from Strong Bad's Bottom 10, of course, which you can find at www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail133.html if you are looking for a charming little laugh. But now, without further ado, the bottom 10 of the your's truly.

10) Sweaty people that stand in front you and sweat all over you. It is mildly disgusting. Like I'm just standing there and this sweaty person comes up and is like "OH! I AM SOOOO SWEATY!" And they shake their mane of hair splattering you with the slimy liquid. And... oh, you really don't want to hear this in detail, do you?

9) Me in my old movies. I cannot belive how completly and utterly stupid I once was. Here's a scene for you to contemplate.

Me: Oh no! My horses! They got stolen! Let's go find them! Here they are! But their locked in a gate! I'll get it! There's a chain around it's neck! Uhh! Got it off! But how do I open the gate?

Brooke: I'll just push the-

Jenae: Shhhh!

Me: Wow! You're right there is a switch under here! But I can't reach it! Can you reach it? You got it! Oh no! The person who stole the horses! Run! Listen, don't steal my horses again!

And so on. I really don't think you need to see the rest of that.

8) People who say stupid stuff A) without realizing it and B) haveing no real reason to say that stupid thing. Like I know this one person who says stuff like "when was the war of 1812?" and "how old are you supposed to be to see PG-13 movies?" I mean, that is really... wait, that is pretty funny. Heh heh. Well, anyway.

7) Those really dumb local commercials. At first the ones that just have pictures of what they are selling like lamps and stuff and they are all like "GET THESE LAMPS NOW AND RECIEVE NO INTEREST FOR 2 MONTHS! THAT'S RIGHT! ABSOLUTLY NONE!!!" Or those ones with terrible acting where everybody is like: "Oh no Earl, what are you doing on that latter again?" "I'm clening up these gutters again! I should have called THE GUTTER COVER!" Terrible Absolutly terrible.

6) Those so called "comedies" that are really depressing. You know, like the ones where the main character gets into all these really funny situations and then at the very end he dies. I mean, what was the point of all that humor? Wasted! FOR NOTHING!!!

5) The smell of a new car. The kind that smells like they sucked out all the oxegen and replaced it with rotten red hots. Boy, that really un-settles my stomach whenever I think about it.

4) Horror movies that have no plot. Like these people walk into a forest and all the sudden something starts killing them all. And in the end, they all die. And then the movie is over. "OH BOY! WHAT FUN! THEY WALK INTO A FOREST AND THEY DIE! THIS REALLY SHOULD DESERVE SOME KIND OF AN AWARD! Yeah, like dumbest genre in the entire world.

3) Pardon me, all people who are offended by this, but George Bush. If you like him, you go ahead and keep thinking that. But personally I think that he is a starange mutated space monkey with an I.Q. about the same temperature as a freezer in Northern Russia.

2) Those one cyber ghost emails where it says "look closly and you will see the ghost, and keep the speakers up high to here the ghost's moan." And then you are all staring closly at the scream and all of the sudden this image of a ghost appears screaming and you're like "OH NO! IT'S A GHOST! AHH! Oh, wait, let me collect my breth hear..." those things are scary. And I hates them I hates them good.

1) For the number one thing that annoys me, I have two things, actually. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the DUTCH! Okay, sorry, I would have made my own up, but it is late and I am tired.

So, there you go, my dear friends. Adam's bottom ten. And with that, I give you adieu. Because it's like 2:00 in the moring. That's early, by the way. Not that you'd know that. I just, oh, whatever, goodbye. And I mean that in the best way possible.