The completly useless guide to absolutly nothing.

First off, I want to say thank you those that have already posted their nominations for the ADHC awards, which is not very many. If you have not done this yet, it is high time that you did so! Scroll down and post your vote in the comments!

Now, on to the guide...

First, I would like to start the guide by explaining the theory behind Star Wars legos. The theory is simply that if you make up a movie and make legos to go with it, lego sales will skyroket. I am sad to say that that theory is absolutly true, and I wasted a whole bunch of money on bunch of teeny tiny lego pieces that when assembled make a teeny tiny model of the lava planet. When you get the little teeny tiny Anaikin and Obi-Wan to battle it out, most of the time they end up in the lava. Just becasue you let go of them and they fall of the teeny tiny platform. A plus, however, is that the lightsabers light up! Awesome! Until the end of the battery life, at least, which is about 35 seconds.

Next, the T.v. show Lost. By the looks of it, it has a good chance of winning an ADHC award. In fact, there is only one show that stands in its way. And that show is Barney. DISPICABLE! Lost is the show of the survivors of a plane crash who land on an island surrounded by mystery. None of which are ever solved. Oh, but then at the very end of the season finale, they finally open the hatch in the ground that we have been waiting them to open forever. Oh boy, I wonder what could be inside... Then BAM! Cut to black. The word LOST flashes across the screen, signaling the end of the episode. Of the season. Yes, I yelled at the T.v. for quite a long time. As anybody would.

In fact, foget the guide. The thought of the corrupt minds behind Lost make new fire arise within me. That, by the way, is my way of saying I don't feel like typing this anymore.

The ADHC Awards!!!!!

Yes! Come, one, come all, to the whenever I feel like it Adam David Hershberger Cameron awards! Here is how it works: I put up my nominations on various things, and then you, you lucky people who actually read this blog you, all six of you, and hopefully more that I have forgotten or don't know about, post your vote in the comments for who you want to win! See, it's fun! And if you don't feel like commenting, then I will just choose for myself who I want to win and you will have to live for the rest of your lives with the huge guilt that you could have possibly changed the outcome of who recieved the ADHC award! Okay, so I will post the winners sometime in July. They will not be here to recive their rewards. But without further ado, except for me saying here are the nominations, HERE ARE THE NOMINATIONS!

Best Author: 1) Lemony Snicket, aka Daniel Handler: A Series of Unfortunate Events
2) J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter
3) Eoin Colfer: Artemis Fowl
4) J. R. R. Tolkien: The Lord of the Rings
5) Phillup Pullman: The Golden Compass

Best Actor: 1) Ewan McGregor: Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
2) Jim Carrey: The Truman Show
3) Mike Myers: Shrek
4) Bill Murray: Groundhog Day
5) Leslie Neilson: Dracula, Dead and Loving it

Best Actress: 1) Julia Roberts: Ocean's 12
2) Drew Barrymore: Ever After
3) Dakota Fanning: The Cat in the Hat (actually, I haven't seen a single movie that has Dakota
Fanning in it, but I'm sure she is a very good actress)
4) Renee Zellwiger: Cindrella Man (same thing as with Dakota Fanning)
5) Catrine Zeta-Jones: Oceans' 12

Best Movie: 1) The Truman Show
2) Forest Gump
3) Shrek
4) The Incredibles
5) Kung Pow! Enter the Fist.

Best T.V. show: 1) Lost
2) Who's Line is it anyway?
3) Late Night with Conan O' Brian
4) Survivor
5) Barney (just to see if anyone votes for it)

Best Person: 1) Adam Cameron
2) Adam Cameron
3) Adam Cameron
4) Adam Cameron
5) Adam Cameron

There, those are the official six categories. YOU MUST VOTE FOR EACH CATEGORY IF YOU WISH TO SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY AGAIN! Okay, possibly a bit dramatic, but if you don't vote you will only have yourself to blame for your favorite actor not recieving the wonderful ADHC award. In fact, vote more than once. Vote a lot more that once.

Draft

Yes, I know, I did not need to publish that last post right away without completing it because there is a SAVE AS DRAFT button on the posting page thingy. Why didn't anybody tell me? WHY MUST I SUFFER FOR YOUR MISCONDUCT? WHO EVEN KNOWS WHAT THE WORD MISCONDUCT MEAND? It is a word, right? I use it all the time. People nod that they understand. I think they just assume that it is a real word and that they are just too ignorant to know the meaning. Or maybe it is a real word. I have know idea whatsoever. Okay, continuing the coverage of me tripping, and, if that word really means something I should not be saying somebody please let me know. We went shopping in the biggest city in the U.S.A! Well, at least one of the top 20 biggest. In Kansas, that is. Which isn't really saying anything. I mean, I live in Wichita, the biggest city in Kansas, and it is still embarrisingly tiny. But not to put down Kansas or anything. IT IS THE BEST STATE IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD! Okay, maybe not, but I get tired of all the sterotypes about us Kanzans. Kansas is not flat, we have rolling hills! I saw them while I was tripping! Kansas is not in black in white, even though the Wizard of Oz would lead you to belive that. And FYI Dorthy, over 87% of OZ merchendice is made in Kansas! So we are more like Oz than anywhere else. And if you think those statistics are unbelivable, you should think of how mind blowing they were when I first made them up! Okay, but seriously, we even have an OZ museum! And custom made OZ T-shirts! Yeah! So the next time you want to generalize about Kansas, you will be hearing from me, and my little dog too! Oh, dear, that was so corny. But oh well. KANSAS IS SO AWESOME! Now back on topic. The city that we went shopping at (in?) was good ol' Newton Kansas. Home of the Newton, uh, people. You know, the ones that live there. One of these places was an old flee market run by some old fat guy. Really nice man, by the way, he just happend to be fat and old. And a bit too happy. I walk into the store and the guy smiles while leaning back in the chair behind the desk. "How ya doing?" he asks. "Good" I respond, one of the many lies that I would tell that day. I looked around for awhile. One thing that caught my attention was a model of one of those Lord of the Rings nazgull or whatever. You know, the ones that run around of horses like complete morons. The ones that don't even think of the possiblity that maybe it would be wize not to let Mr. Baggins get a head start before they start chasing him. Anyway, it has a little slit in its back for coins, I'm guessing it is a deformed version of a piggybank or something. On the box it says "TRY ME!" And of corse nobody is stupid to actually put money in it because there is a possiblity that the item is not really for sale and it is just there to steal coins for gullible little kids. To help you "TRY IT," however, is a little cardboard sword. You take the sword, shove down the little slit, and I swear that nazgull starts screaming like crazy. Just like he does in that one movie with the ring and the short people with misconducly hairy feet. He doesn't even say words, like "AAA! YOU JUST SHOVED A FAKE SWORD DOWN A SLIT IN MY BACK! THE PAIN! THE AGONY! WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO DESERVE THIS? No, he just screams without any direction or purpose. Nazgull really get on my nerves.

Tripping

I have absolutly no idea what that means when you use it in a converstarion. But no problem. Hey, today is the first day that I have posted in a while. I think maybe I will stop trying to do daily posts and from henceforth switch to bloggin whenever I feel like it. Now where was I? Oh yes, tripping. I went on a short day trip with my parents over the weekend to Hays Kansas. There we saw that one dinosaur museum with the robot T-rex that turns it's head and roars at you. Of corse turning its head causes several wires to poke out of its skin and its roar sounds more like an old man choking on a chinken. On this trip I also found a deal on some outdated National Geograpics. Not that I am intrerested at all in National Geographic, but more because it was such a great deal! 12 for twenty five cents. Oh boy, that was an offer I couldn't refuse. What? What's that? I think I here my mother calling, I'd better publish this fast...

Hillary Madeline and Anna

Here is your post. I've been dedicating a lot of these lately. Oh, well.

Me got bored

For those few of you that have been wondering where I could possibly be these past few days, I have been right here. But I have an incredibly good reason for not posting. I didn't feel like it. So if you don't like that excuse then you can go ahead and, um, do something very unplesent indeed. Oh, and my car got totaled. Kind of forgot about that part. Oh, yeah, and I have just discovered that life has absolutly no meaning whatsoever. Besides all that... I got bored. To put it simply. My computer is so slow and outdated that it takes five minutes just to connect to the internet. Actually getting this page up so I can place a new post takes A LOT LONGER. And I just do not have that kind of time on my hands. What I do have on my hands however are a couple of layers of skin, some dirt, and I don't know why anybody is going to care what is on my hands. Well, whatever. Most of my time on this great world wide web of ours has been spent on www.homestarrunner.com . You can go there if you want, or, you don't have to at all. I don't care. If you do, though, play the peasents quest game. It is really fun, but I may be the only one that can tell you what must be done to beat it! Wahahahaha! Dang, I think I've been reading a bit to many books about evil geniuses. I think I'm becoming one. Well, maybe not the evil part. Or the genius part. Well, maybe a little of the genius part. Whatever. I just keep laughing uncontrolably at all the wrong times. Like last night I was playing Lord of the Rings Monopoly and I asked my Mom, "Do you want to trade my two yellow properties for two of your green properties?" And she said "yes, okay" and I said, "WELL TOO BAD! WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Good times.

Lunch

I was reading a book on the history of DC comics, well, actually I was just looking at the pictures. None of information filler. Anyways, my Mom said that she was making some eggs for lunch. So, after a while I head in there and I find that my parents have already eaten. I'm ask "Where are the eggs?" My Mom responds "Oh, I didn't know you wanted some too!" Now this, as it would anybody, really got me mad. "You said you were making eggs for lunch!" "Yes, but not for you!" "Make me some eggs!" "MAKE YOUR OWN EGGS!" So then I protested by not eating any lunch. By 3:30 I was getting very hungry so in desperation I got out the skillet and fried up some eggs. My Mom was sleeping on the sofa, so I woke her up by making very loud stomping noises with my feet. "I'm going to eat some eggs, no thanks to you!" Mom responded by going back to sleep. Anyway I'm going to end with a comment question so that you will know what you can comment about. Good idea, is it not?

COMMENT QUESTION: What is you favorite movie/actor/actress/director? (okay, I guess that is technically 4 different questions, but oh well)

The Long Post

Welcome to the first post in a couple of days. I failed to post because of the utter importance of my business. Which was basicly doing absolutly nothing at all. Now, I could write an entire seperate post for each aspect of my utterly busy weekend, but that would just be a big waste of time for me, especially since my computer runs about as fast as a snail covered in salt. Which, by the way, is very slow, seeing that the snail is slow enough already without the trouble of dizzolving at the same time. Anyways, if you want to here about my weekend you had better get a bag of chips because this post is a long one. And that so far was just the introduction. Well, this weekend I went to Tulsa, OK to visit my family (my Dad's side of the family, at least) After arriving on Thursday night, the DVD player wasn't working, so we just went to bed so that the little DVD player inside are head would play us entertaining dreams. My dream was about Stuart Little joining the Mafia. Or something like that. Anyway, next morning I awoke after a plesent nights sleep on a matress in the sunroom. Wait a minute, that was the night of the thunderstorm that kept me awake. Never mind, the sleep was not that good. Anyhoo, nothing much happened except I played a few games of free cell. The little king in free cell is a sick, sick man. No reason in particular for that, you can just tell by looking into his eyes. Later that day we went to FIRST Borders THEN Barnes and Noble. I bought the novelezation of the movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Really high grade reading material there. No, really, they use big words like "assassinate" You know, really hard ones that you have to sound out. And if you haven't been able to tell that I'm being sarcastic by this point you probably are a very gullible person. HEY! DID YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU HIT YOURSELF REALLY HARD IN THE HEAD WITH A HAMMER THAT YOU WILL GET SMARTER? Oh, no, you actually hit yourself in the head? Wow, you're more gullible than I thought! Hee. Boy, we really are being entertained here, aren't we? (more sarcasm, by the way. you know, in case you couldn't tell.) Wow, this really is long. SUMMARY TIME! I did some more stuff then I came back home. There, that's about it. And now I'm back, so all of you can stop screaming at your computer to update my blog. Sorry, I've got to stop, the noise of my thousands of screaming fans outside is defaning.

Yawn

I can't belive how incredibly tired I am. My Dad wakes me up at 7:30 (that's AM by the way) to go on a ten mile long bike ride around the neighborhood... and quite a few surrounding neighborhoods... in our city. So I get downstairs and first they make me put on sunscreen at this terrible hour. I don't want to because the sunscreen smells a lot like the behind of a 5 month deceased possom lying in a bed made of fat, sweaty gorillas. But of course my parents each have a comeback, my Dad's being "it doesn't even have a smell" and my Mom's being "Is it worth DYING just because it SMELLS bad?" I was going to answer that the smell would probably kill me anyway, but I just went ahead and complied with there wishes. The rest of the bike ride wasn't bad, apart from the fact that by the time it was over I was tired, dehidrated, and hungry since I hadn't had anything to eat. But that was soon solved, because we walked to Burger King and I got free frech toast sticks because yesterday I had won the coupon in the "choose your destiny" Star Wars sweepstakes. On one side it has Darth Vader and Obi-Wan in heated combat, and on the other side it says "WINNER! one free french toast." If George Lucas was dead, he'd be rolling in his grave.

Bothersome Things

Here are a few questions that I have about nothing in particular that I could really use some answers to. If any of the 1, possibly 2 or 3 people that actually read this including myself can answer any of them, that would be great.

1) If there is a spaceship in outer space that could fly as fast as the Earth turns, and it flew at that speed around the Earth in the opposite direction of the direction the Earth turns, wouldn't it, in theory, stay in the same exact place?

2) If somebody throws a snowball at you and it hits you in the face and hurts a lot, isn't it perfectly ethical to pick up a bunch of snow and rub it into their face?

3) If a monkey falls out of a tree and nobody can see it, does he maybe sprout wings and fly back up?

Okay, that's all.

SITH

Finally, I have joined the rest of the entire world and seen Episode III. For those of you that have been stranded on a remote island for 40 years, I am speaking of the third part of the six part space series called Star Wars. I have to say it was my favorie one, and I don't know if that was because it was the first Star Wars I have seen on the big screen, because the writing was better, or because it's the only movie in the entire series that actually makes any sence. I mean, I'd seen the others and enjoyed them a lot, but the whole time I was watching them I had no idea what in the world was going on. Like, in episode 4 there are the good guys, and they fight the bad guys. BUT WHY? Great story, but what is the purpose of your evil nature? With number 3, all that is finally explained, and I can finally sleep at night without terrible nightmares in which I am forced to take a test on the political system of the galaxy. I give it 4 stars. Or however they rate movies in outer space.

A Fun Way to Pass the Time

I think I got this from Jonathan...

How do you keep an idiot busy, scroll down.
























How do you keep and idiot busy, scroll up.

Many Apologies

Sorry for not loyally posting every day like I said I would. I mean, not that anyone cares or anything. But I've been kind of sort of VERY busy lately. So I have and excuse. Let's see... nope, I still have absolutly nothing interesting to talk about. I think I will just type random words for awhile. Monkey prune weasel brocolli lima bean pistol snot. Over.