Warning: Offensive Material Ahead. I have no control over what I write in the following paragraphs, but just so you know, it may be offensive. So if you are one of those people that is going to get offended, I suggest you stop right here. THAT'S YOUR WARNING! DON'T COME COMPLAINING TO ME LATER IF YOU ARE OFFENDED, BECAUSE QUITE FRANKLY IT'S YOUR OWN FAULT. SO THERE!
Today I lost, oh, a good five hours of my life. And I will never, I repeat, NEVER get that hour and a half back. Ever. Again. In fact, today was nothing but a huge waste of time. If I had been sick today and missed school, things would probably turn out just the same tommorow. If not better. Let's begin with the stupid assembly of the Red Ribbons.
Lucky for me, I play cello in the orquesta. No wait, that isn't lucky. It's just a fact. And the orquesta has to play for the entire middle, and not just middle, but all of elemetary also. Like the entire school. Yeah. Why do the people that organize these things never get it? Kindergarten does not belong with 8th grade. You cannot make this thing entertaining for us all!
Of course, they choose to make it entertaining for the Kindergardeners. Those greedy bastards. Let me higlight the stupidest parts of the program:
"This is a drug-free CELEBRATION! But in order to have fun, you need to be quiet when my hand is up,"
No, we'd actually would have much more fun if you let us talk instead of listening to this terribly boring assembly.
"Each one of you is unique. Each one of you is special"
Now, mister vice principal, if that's true, how come you make us all look alike by forcing us to wear uniforms? C'mon, like, "I support individuality by enforcing standerized dress!" Isn't that some kind of oximoron? Or maybe just the moron part, I'm not really sure about that one.
Oh, then there's the part where I get up from where I'm sitting with the orquesta, I'll tell you why in a moment, and this giant speaker falls right where I was sitting. And then the principal steps up in front of everybody and says "it's alright. Accidents happen," Accidents happen? That's all you can say? DAMMIT I COULD HAVE DIED! And if the speaker had just happened to fall off the other way, about 10 little kinders would have been crushed flat. Yes, I know they are all greedy bastards, but that does not excuse the fact that they were very close to an early death. What would have happended then? "Oh, don't worry, sometimes giant audio equitment crushes your friends, but boys and girls we are not here to worry about that! We are here to CELEBRATE being drug free!" Excuse me while I go hurl.
Now as for why I had to get up. The P.E. teacher organized these little chants for all the little kids. Not especially creative. Like "We want hugs! Not drugs!" "Stop and think! Don't drink!" And another one about smoking. Probaly not "we want coke, and pot to smoke!" but that would have been a bit more entertaining. But he also had the middle schoolers make up our own chants. Why must they humiliate us like this? I suppose I should be thankful, because if it hadn't been for these chants I would now be dead. But somehow that may have been the better of the two alternatives considering how the rest of the day went. The chants are as follows, not in exact order, but i don't care:
My group did one I made up myself. Not that I wanted to participate in the conception of this little jingle, but I had no choice consideing the best the rest of my group could come up with was a rip off of the Horace Mann volleyball chant. Actually, that was the girls in our group. Before I interivined and made up the chant we used from on the spot which topped anything they had come up with in over ten minutes, the boys in our group were coming up with pro-drug chants. They're funnier, anyway. But eventually I was like "screw this" and walked over and recited "don't do drugs, don't get high, if you do, you will die." The girls then went off into the corner again and tried to figure out some complicated clapping-dancing crap that I refuesed to be a part of.
Next are the two "wimpy no drug" chants. "Drugs aren't cool for middle school" is one.
The other, the bizzare "drugs are dumb! just chew gum. drugs are dumb! just have fun. drugs are dumb! don't drink rum." I mean, I've seen some stupid things in my life, but this... I think I'm going to go hurl again.
By far the best is the last one. Mine is obviosly the second best, but there's no way I could top this one. After a good rythm of clapping and stomping feet "DO NOT DO DRUGS!" Then Tevin comes out and starts doing some robot type dance I guess... I don't know, I can't name dances. Anyway, it's like "Don't-du-di-di-di-du-di-di-di-di-di-don't do drugs OOOOOOOOOOH DAMN! Served!"
But don't get me wrong. That hardly brightened my mood at all. Today was bound to suck. I thought it had already sucke as much as it was going to. I am sorry to say I was very wrong.
After the assembly, have the students go to the end of the quarter party. The other half don't. The half that did bad. I was one of them. But let me explain.
I do my freakin' homework. I put it in my freakin' binder. When it's time to turn it in, the freakin' homework is not in the freakin' binder. I get detention. Case closed.
That was one isolated incident at the beginning of the school year that was not even my fault. BUT THE SONS OF BITCHES COUNT THAT AGAINST ME!
In case you can't tell, they pissed me off. Yeah. Like major big time.
"You are not here because you are being rewarded. This is not a good thing."
YOU IDIOT! I work my ass off all year, I get a 4.0, and you still punish me like this? You know what kind of message you are sending me? It's "If you do well, and try your hardest, you will be punished," Well, you know what? I'm not going to try as hard the next quarter. And I'm going to even less hard the next.
Well, to start this torturous event, we all go into a room, where we have to watch "what's wrong with marijuana," Here's the three things going through my mind:
1) it isn't legal
2) it is hard to find
3) it's just so damn expensive
Well, not really. But c'mon, I think we already all know what marijuana can do to us, and we can decide for ourselves wheater or not we are going to smoke it. I mean, I'm still against it, but "What's wrong with marijuana" almost changed my mind. It says "Marijuna can make you act differenly. It can make you see things that aren't really there" DUDE! How cool is that? Like I said, still against it, but not as much as before watching that video. Besides, all the people on the video that say it's not cool to take marijuana look like carnival freaks. And all the people that are shown smoking it look pretty good. I mean, what kind of message is this sending our kids anyway? Unfortunatly, that video was the best part of the day. I kid you not.
Enter an hour long torture session. AKA the principal giving a lecture on how we can improve ourselves. I kind of zoned out, my imagination is way more interesting then whatever she was saying. I only really remember what she made us write down, which was something along the lines of change is good, and the choices we make affect who we are. I threw the paper away, of course, it wasn't going to do me any good.
She also made us right goals, which is my big pet peeve. I hate goals. Goals are the very things I wish would just curl up and die. Goals suck. When ever we have an assignment to write goals, I write things my teachers would excpect me to write. Wheter I follow throgh with them or not is my own buisiness. (I don't follow though with them)
But, today, being pissed off, I wrote that I was going to do whatever I could to change the stupid rules this school enforces. And that goal I'm actually going to take seriously. If this petition thing doesn't work, which if it doesn't is goint to piss me off even more than I am currently pissed, I've already got some other plans in the works. Because Horace Mann sucks. And I'm going to do what I can to make it suck less.
